So a couple of weeks ago I posted about how I wanted to say Yes to my kids more often. I thought I'd let you know how that is going...
It seems like every time my kids ask for something, my first reaction is to say No. Though I usually phrase it a little more nicely and say "Not right now." But really, it means no. I'm just hoping they'll forget about it.
But now I'm trying hard to not let that be my automatic response. It's really pretty hard - it seems like they always ask for something just when I'm trying to fix dinner or do the laundry or change a diaper. So then of course my instinct is to say no, because I'm too busy to do it right now.
But I'm trying to be better about it. I'm listening closer to what they ask for and actually thinking about before I respond. I'm not just automatically responding with "not right now." But I still have a hard time just saying Yes right off the bat. Like I said, they always seem to ask to do a craft or play with puzzles or otherwise do something that requires my participation right when I don't have a hand to spare. So instead, my response tends to be "In a minute." I'm putting them off, but I do try to actually follow through after I finish what I'm doing.
So I'm not to the point of saying Yes yet, but I'm making progress. "In a minute" beats "not right now." I'll keep working on it!
7 comments:
That's because "in a minute" is POSITIVE while "not right now" is Negative. Any move towards positive interaction with our kids is an A+ in my book! Well done Miss Tara!
I seem to be having a hard time with this one lately. This is a good reminder.
Yes, as soon as I am finished with the laundry...
Yes, as soon as your toys are picked up...
Yes, as soon as dinner is over...
This gives you the yes but later response but they hear YES!
I have read this idea somewhere too & have been trying to say "Yes" more to anything I"d normally say "No" to.
What a great idea! This summer, I've tried to relax, too. Saying "no" had become such a habit...
I totally agree with Melissa. Kids don't hear the whole sentence, just maybe the first few words. So phrasing it positively like "Yes you can play with legos after...." they think they've won and you are cool!
I'm going to try the idea from Melissa and phrase it better!
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