Thursday, February 27, 2014

Minnie and Figaro

At Haley's suggestion, I am expanding the kids' tv feature to include other cartoons in the real world. :)

Have you ever noticed that things are not exactly to-scale in the world of Mickey Mouse? Check out Minnie Mouse with her pet kitty Figaro.

Anything strike you a little wrong, there? Bizarre enough that a mouse would have a cat for a pet, but what kind of mutant cat is this to be smaller than a mouse?

No, when we apply the real-world filter to this one, it looks more like this...


Oh dear. I hope Figaro isn't feeling hungry!

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Lifting My Sprirt

A friend included me on a little chain letter recently. I usually kind of ignore those, but this time I chimed in because the topic was to share an inspiring quote, poem, or message. And I have two favorite bits that I use to lift myself up when I am having a rough time and I thought I could share them. 
The first is a reminder on the true nature of prayer:

"Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings." (from the Bible dictionary - https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bd/prayer?lang=eng&letter=p)
When I feel like my prayers are going unanswered, I re-read this passage as a reminder that the answer to prayer is not always immediate!

And the second is a reminder of God's love:

"But behold, the Lord hath redeemed my soul from hell; I have beheld his glory, and I am encircled about eternally in the arms of his love." (from the Book of Mormon - https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/2-ne/1.15?lang=eng#14)

I love the imagery of being held, loved, and protected in the arms of the Lord. It helps me feel that I can overcome whatever difficulties have come my way.

What are your favorite bits of inspiration and comfort?

Mr. Lopart Loves His Mother

In our continuing series on Handy Manny Meets the Real World, let's discuss Mr. Lopart. Specifically his mother issues.

This guy loves his mother. I mean he REALLY loves his mother. Any episode featuring Mr. Lopart is sure to include at least one reference to his mother. He is still trying to prove himself to his mother. He constantly searches for his mother's approval. And he seems to spend all his spare time with his mother. He goes to her house for dinner. He and his mother celebrate the cat's birthday together. He can't stand it when Mrs. Lopart wants Manny to come help her with something. Mr. Lopart's only long-term relationships are with his mother and his cat. On Valentine's Day, he mentions that he will not be going to the town's Valentine's Day party because he'll be spending the evening with "the most important lady in my life. Mother."


It's all a little creepy. A few years down the road, and I think we're heading into "Psycho" territory...

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

More Handy Manny Meets the Real World

You all know my deep love for children's TV and my need to express that love through snark. ;)

So today's episode of Handy Manny featured the tools' first airplane ride. In the highly unrealistic episode, all the tools went on a trip to Florida with Manny. The wrongness began when they tools all got to have their own seats in the cabin. Manny is a handyman (who never seems to charge anyone for his work, BTW)... how can he afford this many tickets?

Not to mention, apparently Handy Manny's local airport has never heard of the TSA's Prohibited Items list. It specifically mentions tools. Even more specifically, the list includes hammers, drills, saws, screwdrivers, wrenches, and pliers. You might be able to get away with the tape measure, but I have a feeling it would fall into the category of tools more than 7 inches in length.

So the tools' first experience at the airport would really look a bit more like this...


Thursday, February 20, 2014

Does This Mean I'm A Mormon Behaving Badly?

I'm hardly the first person to write a response to the so-called Well-Behaved Mormon Woman and her bizarre rant against the movie "Frozen," but I just can't get over it. I just HATE the fact that her warped viewpoint is being tied to "Mormon" in the minds of people who see it.

She never says anything in the post to claim that her point of view is shared by the church, but just the fact that she has chosen that particular title for her blog sends a subtext. And she of all people should agree, seeing as she's so obsessed with subtext that she has decided the entire movie is "promoting the gay agenda."

I'm not writing this post to debate the morality of homosexuality, marriage equality, or anything like that. She's absolutely entitled to feel the way she feels. And normally I take a very 'live-and-let-live' approach to people who want to express their opinion. Feel what you like, share your opinion if you choose to, and accept the consequences if there's blow-back. But don't share your opinion in the name of a whole religion, because then the consequences are not yours alone. Now the rest of us are involved as well and will end up facing some of that blow-back when people get the message that Mormons are uptight, paranoid, hateful people who see gay people hiding around every corner trying to get us.

Believe me, since moving away from Utah I have spent a lot of time debunking bizarre and false ideas about Mormons. Some of them are humorous. Some are just misinformation or misperceptions. I don't mind talking about those and sharing another point of view. But this is one I wish I didn't have to deal with, because it's so judgmental and full of over-the-top conspiracy-theorist strangeness. (But don't worry, she assures us that she is "not anti-gay nor am I here to judge homosexuals not worthy of their rightful and respectful place among society." Because surely no one would get that impression from her post. :eye roll: )  

And I have already gotten questions from some of my non-Mormon friends about this whole post, since it's been trending all over the Internet. I suppose it should make me glad that they didn't just accept it and felt ok about asking me my thoughts. It gave me the chance to point them to official church statements on homosexuality, marriage, etc. and to share my personal thoughts instead of just letting WBMW speak for me. But I don't like the fact that people I know - let alone people who don't have a friendly neighborhood Mormon to talk to - might think that I share her viewpoints.

It seems to me that a truly well-behaved Mormon woman would remember the whole thing about loving your neighbor and being a kind and loving person. And that 'judge not' clause might just apply here as well. (Yes, I'm aware that I'm being judgy about WBMW and thus not following my own advice.) 

*sigh* Compared to this, I will welcome the next time someone wants to chat about Mormons and polygamy.

Quick Funnies From Preston

Preston had seen a short cooking segment on Disney channel about artichokes and really wanted to try them. We bought some artichokes for him and he tried them: "It's good!" he exclaimed. But he didn't want another bite. And he went away to the other room for a few minutes. Then he came back out to confess to his Dad: "I don't really like them. But don't worry, I still love you even though you like artichokes and I don't."

Aaron assured him that it was fine if he didn't like artichokes and agreed that they could still love each other even without a shared love of artichokes.

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We were watching Olympic curling with the kids and explaining things when they got confused. Preston is still figuring out the rules of the sport (frankly, so am I - every time I think I understand it, something happens to confuse my understanding) so he asks a lot of questions.

When they paused for a time out he asked: "What did they do wrong? Did they break a rule?"

We were confused by the question and asked him for explain what he meant.

"They're in time out... what did they do wrong?"

LOL - This child is a bit too familiar with time outs. :D

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"Momma... I like that you're... I don't want to say it. It might make you feel bad..."

I assured him he could go ahead and say what he wanted to say.

"I like it that you're, you know, really kind of fat. Because it means you give good squishy hugs."

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I was talking to Haley and described a woman in our ward as an "older woman" and Preston wanted more information.

"So is she kinda old like you? Or is she super old like Grandma?"

He backpedaled a little when he saw my face and tried to explain "Well, not super old like ready to die. Just really a lot, lot older than me."  

Somehow that didn't really make it sound better.

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Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Another Spider!!!!

As a follow-up to yesterday's post about my love for the creepy-crawlies in my former abode...

I know that some people keep tarantulas as pets. And they even have some at the Butterfly Gardens and the zoo that they let people carefully hold and look at. My kids have all held Rosie the Tarantula at the Butterfly Gardens and think that it's really cool.

Not me. Ick. I do NOT like spiders. And the bigger they are, the more I do NOT like them. Ewww... I get the shudders just thinking about them. Luckily, I've never had to deal with one too up-close and personal. I've seen them crawling on a wall or walking across the sand, but they were always far enough away that I could just walk (run!) away (as fast as possible).

A friend of mine was not so lucky...

He was a Marine and was out on a training exercise in the desert. When it came time for sleep, they didn't need sissy things like tents. They were Marines! They just tossed some sleeping bags on the ground and called it a night. The sleeping bags were mummy-style. So if you put your arms inside and pulled the top up around your head, the only part of you exposed to the chilly desert night was your face.

So there he is sleeping, just his face out of the bag. He woke up because something was tickling him. When he opened his eyes, he couldn't figure out what he was seeing at first... but as the remnants of sleep cleared, he realized that he was looking at a tarantula. Which was standing ON HIS FACE. On his face!!

Holy crap. It was on his face. He couldn't brush it away, because his hands were trapped inside his sleeping bag and in the panic of the moment he couldn't seem to figure out how to get them loose. He couldn't shout for someone else to brush it away, because the spider was standing partially over his mouth.

All he could think to do is to try to shake it off. While fully encased in a mummy bag. He re-enacted his attempts for us later. Picture a REALLY spastic version of a breakdancing move... kind of like the worm, but on his back. Shaking frantically back and forth and up and down. And that spider just hung in there.

After several long minutes, the spider finally walked across his face and dropped onto the sand. His mouth finally free, my buddy let loose with what I am assured was a pretty impressive string of profanity as he finally managed to rip his arms free and tear his way out of the sleeping bag.

Standing there shaking with adrenaline from the experience, he suddenly realized that everyone around him was watching him and snickering or outright laughing. Turns out that - good friends that they were - they had watched the spider climb onto the sleeping bag in the first place. Continued to quietly observe as it walked closer and closer to his head. Started to wake their neighbors and place bets as to whether it would step onto his face and how he would react if it did.

But according to reports, not once did any of them consider either sweeping the spider off their sleeping friend or waking him up to let him know it was there. After all, what would be the fun in that?